It is unfair that the person who had been there with us goes one day suddenly! I know this is the most difficult situation in our life if you are going through these days of grief. We miss them, but we have to overcome and move on with our life.
“How can I live with this loss?”, might be the question we ask ourselves every day. So how to cope with this trauma and get back to the track of a peaceful mind?
Take As Much As Time You Want
Cry as much as you want, sit lonely, go through the pain, and teach your mind that the person is not anymore. Yes, this is the hardest time of insomnia, nightmares of the person, suddenly wake up and realizing the moment about the loss, etc. This will be continued to some weeks or months! Go through it and finally get used to the grief. There onwards, the healing process begins!
Get Used With The Disbelief
It is hard to believe the person is not with you henceforth. That disbelief may raise some spontaneous thoughts about the person and will be having a feeling that you lost that person suddenly. Or you may have some dreams about the person and suddenly you wake and you can’t bear the pain of realizing the void. This will last to some months! Get used to it and accept it.
Cope With The Anger And Regret
Maybe you will not cry. It doesn’t mean that you are not suffering. Honestly, many times even I had the same feeling that “why I am not able to cry?”. It will be more painful, that feeling a lump of pain on the throat, right? This will reflect as anger. You may shout at the people as you can’t manage the pressure. Keep it in mind that, this will be there. You will get angry and you will calm down soon.
Another thought is, “you could have done as many things as possible to prevent the death!”. So you will fantasize about the possible ways could have done from your side to keep the person alive! Expect this guilt feeling and realize that you did not do anything to suffer this loss. No one can predict death, it can come suddenly and unexpectedly!
Acceptance And Start To Interact
You may go through depression and it is time for acceptance. Start to interact with people who are suffering with you. Try to give mental support to others and accept support from them. This will push to move forward and it will create a feeling that you are not alone!
Cherish The Memories And Embrace The Good Things They Left
They were part of our life. Cherish the wonderful memories they gifted to you. Motivate yourself to do the good things they asked you to do and the things they wished you to do. If a person leaves this world, all things they leave are good memories and the wonderful changes they made on you. You can start writing down the memories and read it and realize how beautiful it was! It will definitely make you sad, but at the end of the healing, it will leave a soothing feel since it was a great time with that person!
Get Back To The Track
Time will heal every scar. But the thing is, it will take time. You may be a working person or a student. You want to get back to your professional life and concentrate on that. Start everything gradually and interact with your friends and colleagues. It will help to get back to your life slowly. Try maximum to not start a new habit like smoking or drinking during this time. Our mind is strong enough to deal with it without the help of these things. So read, write, keep yourself engaged, and start something new to make yourself calm down. It will be like burning inside at some times, but it will heal. Cry whenever you want and pacify yourself. Keep the positive things they left with you. Move on!